A trip down memory lane...

Not always a bad thing to do-to sit back and reflect, consider, learn and grow. It's been a long road I've traveled, with no obvious end in sight. There have been mountains to climb, cliffs to jump and quick and so powerful I almost failed to drag myself back up. When it all comes down to it, even I'm surprised I made it so far at times, let alone made it mostly intact.

Just reading back on my livejournal (yes, I have one of those...old school style), I was looking back at all that has happened over the years. How I've changed, how others have changed and how life has just changed in general. I've grown, learned from my mistakes. I've had my heart ripped out, I've been emotionally abused, I was betrayed by a person I never believed could take advantage of me the way he did, I learned not to trust and how to trust again. I learned that life will disappoint you, and because of that you have to value it all the more. Because it's the good between all the bad that makes the rest of it worth putting up with. I've learned that there is nothing more powerful than knowing your own self worth and realizing that you DO deserve better. I've also disappointed myself many many times. I've lived, and not regretted, for it wasn't worth living if I wasn't able at least to take the smallest lesson from it. And I've certainly done many MANY stupid things.

But...

I'm here. I reflect and I learn from my past and i move on to make something better out of my future. I'm getting a good (and damn pricey) education. I'm aiming to further myself intellectually and creatively. I'm getting healthier, and learning there's no use complaining about things unless I've got the balls to change them. My shoulder is slowly healing (I can reach the middle of the back of my head now~!) and soon I'll be back to work.

I'm feeling okay. And I have some new goals.

1. Lose the weight I put on because of shoulder, as well as the weight I was starting to lose before the stupid thing gave out again.

2. Start writing again. I used to be very much the writer. I wouldn't go so far as to say I was amazing, but I had talent, and I've let it go to waste. There are countless stories I've left unfinished, poems without endings and plots without climaxes. Such a waste.

3. Read books that will change my outlook on life (mostly to get those of you who think I read too much porn off my back =p)

4. Keep the romance alive.

5. Save up for my new laptop (beloved macbook, be mine...I have a gadget problem...)

6. Come out of it all better than before.

Those are my goals for the year. Pretty simple and straightforward.

It may be a little late in coming, but i hope everyone has a good year full of reward and promise.

And treasure your friends, you never know when you may need them most.

-Sio-